28 March, 2014


Last night, I had the perfect vision of how today was supposed to turn out. I’d wake up at seven, be a good girl and put on some sunscreen after washing my hair, and go to the supermarket to get some stuff to eat.

It didn’t turn out that way.

I did wake up at seven, but I switched off the alarm clock and went back to sleep, probably due to the fact that I’ve been sleeping in until eleven since school was out. Force of habit. Anyway, I didn’t wake up until ten, and so I was greeted with my dad’s ritualistic, “Good afternoon,” after I went downstairs.

The good thing is, I did wash my hair and put on some sunscreen.

I also did go to the supermarket, but that didn’t turn out very well, either. I needed to buy some avocados and mushrooms, but I couldn’t find the mushrooms so I hobbled over to somebody who was shoveling huge onions into trays and asked him where the mushrooms were.

He gave me an apologetic chuckle, as though immediately realizing that I’d never bought a mushroom before – which is true – and directed me to the refrigerator.

I felt like a clown.

The place had ran out of avocados, so I settled for some pears that looked like apples and a box really delicious-looking strawberries that I couldn’t wait to devour once I got home. I put all of it in my basket and headed over to the cash registers. The cashier, who was busy talking to her friend over the counter, began to bill my items as I apprehensively waited for the total amount to appear on the computer screen which I stared at awkwardly.

Then, like an ass, I told the cashier I didn’t need the strawberries because I didn’t have enough money – which was also true. It felt utterly horrible to part with those beautiful red strawberries and I carried home two ugly green pears that cost me more than a bottle of Nutella, and a package of muddy mushrooms that I had no idea what to do with.

I biked home on the wrong side of the road because I was too lazy to cross, and when I got home, I Googled “how to clean, cut and cook mushrooms”. I learned how to do so, and I decided to rehash the stir fry I’d failed at making last week. I chopped up some cabbage and onions, julienned some carrots and peppers, and anxiously cleaned and chopped a mushroom – which felt really slimy, and I was a little nervous because I hoped I wouldn’t get food-poisoned.

The stir fry turned out blackened, overly salty and with a little too much bell pepper in it. My brother and I ended up gobbling up the mushrooms and the sadly wilted, brown cabbage, and letting the undercooked-but-overcooked bell peppers slide down into the compost pit.

To satiate my still-hungry self, I ate one of the pears. It tasted very crisp and sweet, but eating it made me feel guilty – partly because they cost me so much and also because I kept wondering, “What if this were a cup of strawberries instead?”

Needless to say, the day before yesterday was a lot better. So what if my cat scratched me so bad that I bled? I got three albums off iTunes: Tantara’s Based on Evil, which I’m totally going to submit a review of to Encyclopaedia Metallum; Overkill’s Ironbound and Judas Priest’s Painkiller (okay, yes – I did hop on the Priest bandwagon a little later than most other metalheads).

I also made a fused plastic wallet on the day before yesterday. My mother told me it was very creative, but honestly, it looks like grocery bags sewn together with raven-black strands of hair, so there’s almost a hundred-percent chance I’ll never ever use it in the rest of my life.

Also, yes, I’m aware that I missed last Megadeth Monday. I’ll put up the article for “Killing is My Business… and Business is Good!” on the upcoming Monday. Without fail. Happy now?


  1. Ah, yes. A day that doesn't go according to plan.
    Why did your cat scratch you that badly? Did you get a TT?

    1. I touched her head, and she doesn't like being touched on her head. I got a TT a while back, so it probably isn't a problem. Thanks for the comment!

  2. Eh. First-time dishes never go well. Especially if you've never worked with the ingredients before.